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Archive for the ‘Free to be Me’ Category

We all need to hear these words…

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Ever find yourself so overwhelmed that you can’t do anything? That’s me right now as I type. Ugh. HATE these moments. Sometimes I need to give myself a pep talk.  We all do. (I know you do, too!)  I am finding myself stuck.  My head swirling in a million directions.  My plate full.  So many things to do.  Unable to focus in this moment.  And so I find myself in need of a pep talk.  Reminder of truth.  And here I am…finding myself grateful for this landing place.  Grateful for friends who encourage me.  Grateful for the choice to claim truth and for the freedom of religion in our country.  Grateful I now know where to turn when I feel this way.

I’m writing this and claiming it for what it is out loud here.  Why?  So that this fog I feel can’t have power over me.  So that the darkness doesn’t win and the light of Jesus only remains.  I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.  I will not cave to the fear nor to the feelings of being overwhelmed!  I will claim victory over this crap because GOD IS IN CONTROL…because GOD IS FAITHFUL AND GOOD…because GOD LOVES ME AND WILL NEVER FORSAKE ME…because GOD IS BIGGER!!!!!!!!

Words swirled in my head this year as I began to figure out what was my word for 2013.  Grace has been a strong word for me the past 6 months.  All I keep finding myself saying over and over again is “God is gracious.”  I thought maybe it would be that word because well it has been my guiding light.  I thought maybe it could be rest, receive, shine, trust, release, wait or dream.  But as I wrote words down in prayer a new word jumped off the pages of my previous journal entries…behold.  I was shocked.  It kinda snuck in there, but yet it encompasses so much and has so much more depth than I ever knew.  It popped off the page as I wrote it.  I gave a little Huh?!” aloud and then said, “Ok, God, let’s unfold it some more.”

Behold means to draw attention to something; to perceive it visually and mentally; to see clearly; to watch; to notice; to look upon; to gaze to see with attention; to direct or fix the mind; to discern; to envision.

Behold, I make all things new.”  Revelation 21:5

“Do not remember the former things, nor consider the things of old.  Behold, I will do a new thing, now it shall spring forth; shall you not know it?  I will even make a road in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”  Isaiah 43: 18-19

This year…this week…today…I will behold.  I will look towards today God with trust and faith.  I will not be fearful or anxious because God, you are making all things new.  I will look towards the grace you will continue to bestow on me in lovingkindness.  I will wait in patience…I will release the stuff that distracts me…I will rest in you alone, God…I will behold your faithfulness and your grace, God.  I will shine for you when I behold you.

Thank you for continuing to open my eyes to truth, God.  Thank you for honoring me, Lord.  Thank you for the ways you help me grow and learn through all things good and bad.  Thank you that when I behold, I can focus and see you more clearly.

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The Guest House

I find this poem interesting enough that I keep coming back to it since a friend shared it with me.  Our society runs from pain and masks over it time and time again…trying to hide from our own brokenness.  There is freedom to be…freedom to feel…freedom to experience oozing from this poem.  We must stop running and instead embrace each moment, both good and bad, for the crowd of sorrows has a purpose in our lives.

THE GUEST HOUSE

This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.

The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.

Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.

— Jelaluddin Rumi,
translation by Coleman Barks

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